No Room For Judgment
by feathered moon wings
Summary: As exasperated as Steve was, he never expected to find Sameer is such compromising positions, well actually scratch that, he did expect it, but never quite like this. He couldn't move when he sees them. There he was, his friend, one of his best friends, laying with another man in a rumpled hotel bed. His friend, still inside this stranger. "Do you hate me?" Sameer asks.


**WARNING: Homophobia of the time period and a dash of racism, same, from the time period. Nothing brutal though.**

* * *

"Where is he?" Steve mumbled exasperated as he walked down the hotel's hall, they were late and Sameer was _unbelievable_. If they didn't leave right that moment he was getting in so much trouble for the both of them.

"Sameer?" He knocked on another door. "Sami?"

He heard some grumbles from the other side of the wood.

"Bugger off!" Shouted an angry man and the blond moved ahead.

"Unbelievable." He muttered under his breath, cursing how late they were going to be.

He raised his head and caught sight of a familiar handkerchief hanging from the knob of a door.

"Gotcha you little idiot. Sameer!" He instantly tried the door and it opened without restrain.

Steve froze.

So did Sameer and another.

The blond American looked at them and he just _couldn't move_. There he was, his friend, one of his _best_ friends, laying with another man in a rumpled hotel bed. His friend, still _inside_ this stranger.

"_Fuck!_" Steve reacted a moment after the eternal second he had stood frozen.

A flurry of sheets, arms and legs stumbled from the bed.

"_Merde!_" Sameer cursed as he struggled to his feet, the other man dashing for his clothes that were spread around the room like confetti.

There was a horrified look in his brown eyes when they crossed Steve's, desperate to run far, far away.

As distracted as they were with their locked gazes, they hardly noticed the other lanky, blond man in the room as he approached Steve. He made a sudden effort to shove the Captain outside the room. Now _that_ was a mistake.

At the first sign of pressure, Steve's training kicked in and he grabbed the other's wrist in a forceful grip but luckily stopped before he could do the strange man- well, boy was more like it- any real harm.

Steve tore his eyes from Sameer to look at the boy he was restraining, who was desperately trying to break free. He let go and stepped back to give the stranger some space. The young man took the opportunity and shoved at Steve again, this time succeeding in pushing him out of the room and slamming the door in his face.

Captain Steven Trevor stood alone in the hotel hall, frozen again.

"Shit." He said.

* * *

After a panicked escape down the window stairs with his current lover, Sameer was a minute away from loosing his head.

"_Merde_, shit, shit! _Fuck_!" He ran his hands over his unruly hair and felt the prickle of tears in the corner of his eyes. He walked the dark streets towards the docking bay without really thinking about it.

What was he going to do? He had fucked up bad. He had fucked up so, so bad.

He loved Steve too much to lose their friendship, he couldn't lose that, they had lived through too much together; he just couldn't. He felt his heart ache at the thought.

Sameer lowered his head and swallowed a sob. He kept walking, smothering the wrinkles of his rumpled clothes caused by his latest escapade. He couldn't hold in the sob that came then.

Heat rose to his neck and face as a familiar shame filled him. His skin prickled with self-disgust and a sense of wrongness that always came after sleeping with another man.

Never mind that he would lose Steve's friendship, what if Steve _told the army_. He knew that Trevor was trustworthy and had always been a great man, despite all he had done as a spy. But _this_. This was always different, it didn't matter how much someone loved you or how long they had known you, _this_ changed everything. This sin made people kill their brothers and sons.

Sameer let out a shout and kicked a crystal bottle on the street that shattered against a wall.

What was he going to do? If Steve told the army would they execute him? No matter how valuable of an asset he was, his skin was dark and he loved other men just as much as everyone knew he loved women.

He cleaned the tear streaks off his face and kept walking.

_What was he going to do?_

* * *

Steve ran down the stairs and out the back. He caught a glimpse of blond hair as it disappeared behind a wall and he dashed forward. He didn't shout, but the young man turned his head and ran faster still when he saw the spy. It was not enough though.

With a last burst of speed, he caught the boy's shirt and hauled him back. The other blond struggled in his grip until Steve immobilized him in a locked grip.

"Let me go." The young man hissed, venom in his voice and an unmistakable tremble that the pilot knew well- deep rooted fear.

"Calm down, I'm not going to hurt you." He said exasperated, he didn't have time for this.

The younger man scoffed and struggled harder against the iron hold.

"Where did he go?" Steve demanded and took a moment to observe the boy's physical reactions "Where did the other man go?"

"I'm not going to tell you." He grumbled in his light voice but his eyes flickered.

"Calm down." Steve ordered again and after a tense moment the stranger resigned and went lax. He was trembling still; frightened despite his courage.

"I'm not going to hurt you, okay?" The spy repeated softly.

He relaxed his hold but didn't let go, turning the man to face him as he grabbed his shoulders and looked into a pair of young green eyes. The boy's eyes flickered again and Steve had his answer, but there was still something he had to do before catching Sameer.

"I'm sure I don't have to tell you what you did is illegal," he said seriously, "Both of you were stupid about it. Jesus, lock the fucking door next time." He sighed exasperatedly and the green eyes widened in surprise.

"What are you saying?" The boy asked, wary but hopeful.

"I'm not turning you in, if that's what you're thinking." He let go finally, the young man was still enough.

Steve looked at the blond as he lowered his head, the fire in him subdued. He didn't have time for this, but a few more words of warning would hurt no one.

"Just be careful. Now go."

Green eyes gazed at him from under blond locks, the boy nodded and vanished into the night.

When the Captain was sure the other had disappeared he headed down the street green eyes had looked at several times, but had not taken. It was a start. Hopefully it wouldn't take too long finding Sameer.

* * *

"Shit…" He whispered again with a sigh.

Sameer leaned back against a dirty wall and took in a deep breath. His heart rattled madly against his chest and down his brown skin -and despite the cold night air- beads of sweat glided on his forehead; he brushed them away.

Then for a moment, he couldn't breath at all. He bent forward and pressed his palms against his eyes, attempting to inhale the air he so desperately needed.

He remembered the short redhead from the British army, how he'd disappeared after he was discovered with another man. Pedophile, they'd called him. He'd appeared dead on the riverside a few days later, not even a trial had been given, and nobody had said a single word about it.

"It's going to be okay. It's going to be okay." He whimpered until his voice broke with a sob. "I'm going to be okay." He cried quietly in the empty street.

The official document said 'accident'. He knew better, everyone at that camp knew better.

The Moroccan whispered to himself and concentrated on breathing until he lost track of time, he breathed until his heart stilled at last.

Then he heard footsteps coming his way.

He straightened his back and placed a pleasant look on his face for the passerby, erasing every trace of distress, prepared to lie as a convincing night stroller. That is until he caught a glimpse of blond locks and bright blue eyes.

Steve.

His heart froze. Sameer bolted.

He heard a quickening set of steps behind him and cursed.

"Wait!" The blond said as he rushed behind him. "Sami, _**wait**_."

He stopped at the command and closed his eyes tightly. There was no way he was outrunning the spy, _Captain Trevor_, in any situation. He schooled his face as the steps behind him, now calm, came closer. He turned to face Steve.

The blond, like him, had a masked face, but his hands were up in a pacifying gesture, like he was claiming a wild animal. Sameer bristled in anger, while his heart beat painfully inside his ribcage. He was not a wild creature and he _did not_ want to deal with this.

A few drops of precipitation fell from Steve's' brow and over his serious eyes. The spy stopped a few paces from him. The sound of the water splashing gently against the stone harbor filled the silence for them.

"Sit, please." The blond nodded at a long stone bench on the wall.

With a deep feeling of defeat Sameer sat warily and as far from the American as he could. Even if he wasn't as agile as him, he could still run for it, he could still…

Sameer's chest hurt, he remembered Steve placing his arm over his shoulders and giving him a lazy hug. He remembered his closeness with the blond and already he mourned the loss of it. He grabbed the fabric of his pants and made tight fists, anxious.

He couldn't decide what was worse, losing his friendship with Steve or fearing him and what he might do.

Steve sat slowly but made no effort to make space between them or close it off.

They didn't talk as they looked at the dark waters. The Moroccan held his hands together and fiddled with them, waiting; his heart rattling again like when this had started.

"Can I tell you a story?" Steve said so suddenly it startled the other out of his musings.

A light breeze ruffled their hair as Sameer looked at the man, his eyes guarded. He nodded anyway; he was listening.

"Once, I was tasked with a mission to get information from and unsavory chap." Steve shrugged lightly. "You know the drill, can't tell you the details, but… I was chosen for this job specifically because the man was very paranoid about his information. I infiltrated his circles, I watched and waited." He said solemn.

He took a breath and could clearly see he had Sameer's whole attention; the man had always loved to hear the blond's stories; it almost made Steve smile.

"But the man was good, incredibly good actually. His paranoia made him trust no one and leave not one single detail unguarded. I'd been there about two months without any significant development; my superiors were getting angsty. I had to do… something, anything to get results." He was quiet for a moment and didn't take his blue eyes from the water, he continued. "What I had noticed in my stay though was something quite peculiar. As good as he was at hiding information, hiding people is a bit harder than that." He turned to Sameer with knowing eyes. "He liked sleeping with boys."

The would be actor looked away quickly, heat rising on his face. But Steve kept talking, paying no attention to the other's shame.

"It was rare for him to take them back to his place, he was careful like that. But still, sometimes he did when the occasion was right, when he found them special maybe. So _I_-" He stretched the word, uncomfortable, then rolled his eyes at himself "I seduced him." He said, swallowing minutely.

Sameer snapped his head back up. What was Steve saying?

"I… hinted at him to great lengths until he finally approached me himself. I managed to make him want to take me back to his place. Then…" He looked for words he didn't have, in his hands, the ground, the night sky "Well, then I let him have his way with me." He was not looking at Sameer anymore.

Brown eyes stared at the other, shocked.

The blond felt a prickling sensation all over his body at the memory of hands on his arms, on his legs; breath full of alcohol sweeping into his mouth; his own face forcing an enchanting smile as he pretended he'd done this before and loved the feeling. He'd buried his face in the pillow as he hid a wayward tear and just let it all happen.

"I managed to slip a sedative in his wine so when he fell asleep he wouldn't wake up again. Found what I needed, made copies of the information and well… _The point is_."

His story had been almost clinically told, like an outsider's perspective, detached. He was a spy after all and detachment was easy, or at least it should've been.

"The point is… it would be fairly hypocritical of me if I judged you for something I'd already done." He looked at the dark eyes of the other with resolution, just in time to see a tear roll down his brown skin.

Sameer felt for his friend, he could tell despite it all that it had hurt him to tell the story, but…

"That is bullshit," Sameer whispered, "That is bullshit, it's not the same." He hissed with anger. "You did it out of duty, you were doing it out of duty and honor-"

"Oh, there was nothing _honorable_ about it." Steve said angrily, his own feelings on the matter surfacing. "I laid with another _**man**_ to get information out of him-!"

Sameer covered his face with his hands and hid from the blond and the disgust in his words. It was already beginning, the abysmal gap people made between him and themselves when they knew about _it_.

"No. No." Steve shook his head and looked pointedly at the other "That's not what I'm trying to say! Sameer… Sami. I meant to say that you… you have nothing to fear from me, I swear." He said this quietly as he waited for the other.

Sameer sniffed noisily.

"You hate me?" He asked in a harsh yet quivering voice.

"No, I don't hate you." Steve said, quiet and sorrowful. "I could never-"

Sameer looked at his too honest eyes and bristled with newfound anger.

"No, no, _no_! Don't you pull that _petty_ spy bullshit with me!" He stood up and glared at the other. "I won't have it Steve, I will _**not**_!" He paced away. "Either you are truthful with me or-!"

"_Sami_, I don't _hate you_." The blond stood up, his eyes pained. Tentatively, he placed his hands on the other's shoulders and stopped his pacing.

The shorter man looked away to the water and shuddered at the contact. A tear fell from his eye at the sudden relief that Steve was not shying away from touching him.

"I… I don't understand it… but I don't hate you." He squeezed his shoulders lightly. "Sameer, look at me, please." The spy said and the other complied, taking in the firm yet pained blue eyes of the blond. "I could _never_ hate you."

"Are we still friends?" Sameer asked, desperate to know. "_Steve_, please don't rat me out to the army, _please_." He begged, his earlier fears creeping back onto him.

"_I wont_. I swear. Sami… know that no matter what you do, no matter if you're… _fairy_ or whatever, you're my friend and I would _never hurt you_ like that." He gave him a small, gentle shake of the shoulders "You're my friend, my _best_ friend. There's no way in hell I'm letting anything happen to you. I'd die first."

Sameer sighed shakily. He placed his hands on Steve's forearms and let his head fall down, exhausted.

"You're my best friend too." The Moroccan whispered fiercely, albeit a bit wetly from tears newly shed.

"Come here." Steve pulled him in for a hug and when the other's shoulders began shaking, the blond hugged him harder. "I would rather _die_, Sami. You hear me? _Die_."

Sameer cried a laugh and gave a playful smack at the American's shoulder.

"Stop it you idiot, my plan is to stop crying, not to cry harder." His shoulders still shook but in between the tears small bursts of laughter came through.

"Sorry." Steve chuckled and then sighed, pulling the Moroccan away slightly. "If you ever need it… you can confide in me, you know?" He told him, just a bit hesitant, feeling despite his willingness that it was too much of a step for them to take.

"I would like that." Sami smiled, eyes still watery though his crying had stopped.

"Come on." The blond placed his arm over his friends shoulders "We should've been at the base yesterday and _I'm_ in so much trouble already."

"_Shit_, I forgot about that." Sameer cursed as they began walking.

"Don't worry." Steve smiled "I'll protect your skinny brown ass from the general's wrath."

"What makes you think I want it protected?" He said after a moment which found them both stopping in their tracks and staring at each other silently at the attempted joke.

They broke into a fit of snickers as they leaned against one another.

"I'm probably going to regret that offer." The blond said ruefully.

"Yeaaah, probably." Acknowledged the other as they kept walking.

As they passed through the harbor, a lightness filed Sameer's chest. For a moment, he squeezed his friend in their one armed hug and relished in the feeling of their unbroken friendship. His heart and mind glad and content.

* * *

**Abril: Hello everyone! I hope you enjoyed this one shot. First let me say I was very hesitant to write this, all the touchy subjects it contained made me sweat in my shoes with the thought of writing something wrong. I DID show this to a gay friend of mine to get some pointers but she told me it was perfect as it was so… I'll be trusting her judgment on that one hehe.**

**This story was partly inspired by the Sameer in the story The Kind Old Sun Will Know (on AO3) in which he is married and his wife knows he had relationships with men, I don't quite remember, I read it a long time ago (like, this story was also started a long time ago so…)**

**I'm open to any constructive criticism guys :) **


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